This Just In: Report Says I'm Supposed to be On Edge
With all that's going on in the world, this past week, all I needed was to learn of a Missile Crisis in my own backyard!
I mean, who the hell knew??
Orange County's first missile crisis deepened on Wednesday after county mediators got tired of fast food and taking spit baths in the restrooms. Several Inter-municipal ballistic missile (IMBM) sites in Irvine and Santa Ana remained on high alert as a result of the failed talks.
"We are very concerned about the situation," said one county mediator who wished to remain anonymous. "Have you ever tried to dry your pits with paper towels? Let me tell you, friend. It sucks."
Residents in both cities are on edge.
I discovered a great website covering the Orange County Scene in a most interesting way, this evening: OC Legend: Orange County's Original News Fabricator.
COUNTY MISSILE TALKS FAIL: Conflict between Irvine and Santa Ana escalates -- Supervisors throw in the towel after 58 hours of intensely unproductive negotiations.
I guess I'd better head over to the nearest Army Surplus Store in the morning.
In the meantime Nikita, and I will take turns on watch, overnight, to make sure those dastardly Irvinebollah folk don't infiltrate Santanastan from the north. ;-D
Santanistanista Kiril over and out!
***UPDATE -- 0830 HOURS***
Working in 3 1/2 hour shifts Comrade Nikita and I stayed alert throughout the night for any shenanigans by the Irvinebollah.
All was quiet.
I do not believe they will be a problem considering that they also have to worry about Tustinistan, NewportBeachistan, and CostaMesaville, on other borders ( The CostaMesaville Airforce has its facility ( Named after a famous area warrior named John Wayne ) right on their border. ), not to mention LakeForestinia, LagunaHillia, and others, along the borders of its wilderness fringe.
Santanistanista Kiril over and out!
***END UPDATE***
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