The search continues, this morning, for the revealers of the fate of Harry Potter, by Anti-Wizard Moonbats, the other day, in the quiet seaside community of Huntington Beach, CA..
The latest Book, Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, was set for release at local bookstores at midnight tonite, and it remains to be seen see if Earth people were civilized, and intelligent enough, to handle its revelations.
"I know that people are going to be very annoyed with who-ever it was that revealed the plotline, but jeez, people, get a life! " said 60 year old Granma, Mrs. Mugglesworth. "I can't go anywhere near a bookstore, or a Multi-Plex due to the whole world going Potty over Potter."
"We believe that he, she, um, whoever revealed the facts, is possibly jealous that so many people gots the hots for J. K. Rowling, and not their works," said Chief Investigator Jeri Dalts, of Huntington Beach PD. "The fact that this crime is still unsolved is terrible for the cause of Literary Outreach in our city, and the world, as the Summer Reading Season heats up."
Though a clue was found on the grounds of nearby Goldenwest College, investigators remain clueless, with no way of identifing the perpetrator.
"I've seen book, and movie frenzies, like this before," said Mrs. Mugglesworth. "Of course I've always tried to just ignore it, and was always successful. Until this month."
According to experts such tragic behavior, surrounding the publication of a book, occurs with disturbing regularity. "It's an ancient risk that the Writers, and Publishers, have always taken," said Prof. Yor Leig Bingpuled, of the United Nations Office for the Investigation of Book Publishing Scandals and other Unexplained Phenomena .
The revelation has left many of the Wizards fans, young, and even younger, very pissed off.
"Our God, J. K. Rowling, has been very cross all week," said a local 4th grader, who wished to remain un-named because she was ditching school today to be in line for the midnight release of the book, on the scandal, "Especially at the New York Times!"
White House Spokesman, Tony Snow, said the President had no comment.
Spokespersons for Democratic Leaders in Congress said they will form a Committee.
Pat Robertson, on the 700 Club, said it was God's Will.
Republican Leaders are hoping Pat will just shut up, and believe that the whole thing will just blow over by Saturday night.
Cindy Sheehan plans to read the whole Potter series, from start to finish, over the summer, in the hopes that she can glean some nugget that could help her in her possible campaign to run for the office now held by Nancy Pelosi.
I know that this reporter speaks for many Americans, when I say...
I have not read the books, but thoroughly LOVE the movies! ;-D
I also wish to say Kudos to Rowling for creating a series that has helped kids discover the joys of reading.
Now the big question is not where the next Big Thing in Young Adult Literature will come from, but whether those affected, for all these years, by this series, will expand their horizons, and stick with reading for the rest of their lives.
Some say that there are indications that they have, and will.
I certainly hope so. ;-D