Today is a great day for freedom. I think it's entirely fitting that I have chosen this day to announce the biggest event in the New Media's short history. Today is the long awaited launch day for Head Up Yer Ass Media ( H.U.Y.A.M. )
What is Head Up Yer Ass Media, you ask?
Head Up Yer Ass Media is the brainchild of blogger Kiril, The Mad Macedonian, of Sneakeasy's Joint. That's me. I have a peculiar sense of humor, and I'm a Conservative, so sue me.
It is an effort of the soon to be 3 yr. old Fighting W.a.c.k.i.e. All-over Project ( FWAP!! ).
As the 1st post of the project, in Sept. 2003 explained:
I, The Mad Macedonian, secure in my Branch Maceyugoserbulgarigreekadonian Compound, has decided to ally myself with The Emperor in the ongoing battle to expose the minions of the World Allied Conspiratorial Kongress of Idiotarians Everywhere ( better known as W.A.C.K.I.E. ).
Here's what Head Up Yer Ass Media is all about:
Head Up Yer Ass Media is an exclusive club.
You have to be a member of the Mainstream Media ( MSM ), as Journalist, Pundit, or Columnist, to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You won't be invited into Head Up Yer Ass Media. You could find your self unceremoniously inducted at a moments notice. Unlike some other hoity-toity Clubs, you won't have to wait forever.
If you are reading this, and you don't want to be in, too bad. Be an objective, fair and balanced journalist!
And you won't want to be in. It's that embarrassing to be inducted.
You don't have to be a "big time" journalist to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to get hired by any "big time" Network, Newspaper, or Magazine, to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to have been profiled by Nation, or New Republic Magazines to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to be remotely objective to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't even have to have a blog, or regular newspaper column, to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to have a cool show set design to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to worry, too much, if you are Conservative, about ending up in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You DO have to worry, VERY MUCH, if you are a Liberal, about ending up in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to be political to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to wear a Suit to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to wear anything.
Your appearance on air can last five minutes or 120, and you can still be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
Your newspaper, or magazine column, can be on anything, and you can still be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to like Sneakeasy's Joint to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to mention Sneakeasy's Joint to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't even have to like, or mention, my other blog, The Cycling Dude, to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to have been mentioned on Instapundit, or Pajama's Media, to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media, though appearing in a Hot Air column, or Video will hasten the approval process.
You can have a crappy hairdoo and be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You can ignorantly trash the Blogosphere on the air, in a column, or news article, and be in Head Up Yer Ass Media, and the approval process will move very quickly.
Boy, am I having way too much fun writing this thing, or what? Hee, hee! ;-D
You don't have to be a hotttie ( Think Helen Thomas, and Dapper Dan Rather ) to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to pay dues to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to be high on the TV Ratings to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't even have to know what the make-up of your core audience is to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to care about your audience at all.
You can say, or write any ol' shit you are inclined to, and find yourself in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
No-one is going to kick you out of Head Up Yer Ass Media unless, and until, you come to your senses, and promise to mend your errant journalistic ways.
You'll get no praise for being in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
In fact, there's absolutely no advantage to being in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You will get bombarded by a kazillion e-mails to your show, magazine, or newspaper, from outraged Americans exressing exactly why we think you have your Head Up Your Ass .
You can defend your views as much as you want, or as little as you want, during your membership in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You can be inducted into Head Up Yer Ass Media, and then be released on good behavior, and then be inducted again, and then released again, and then inducted again, and then released again, as many times as you deserve.
There are many celebrities in Head Up Yer Ass Media, true, but being in Head Up Yer Ass Media will not make you a celebrity.
You don't have to have a pronounceable name to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
If you're in Head Up Yer Ass Media, you will be required to agree that the Blogosphere, in all its infinite variety, is, as the New Media, a valid new voice in the Media World, before your release will be considered.
The Blogosphere won't ever mention you favorably if you're in Head Up Yer Ass Media, even though it may read, or watch, you regularly . But then, they weren't doing that so much anyway, so that's no big loss.
You don't have to be a member of the ACLU, or a darling of the Far Left to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to be all overly serious, and self-important, to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to have a law degree to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to be a former politician, turned Pundit, to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media, but if you are, and the shoe fits....
You don't have to be any kind of jerk to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media, but if you are, and the shoe fits....
You don't have to be a nun or a minister to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media, but if the Habit, or Collar, fits....
You can smoke pot and be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You can even report about sex and be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You don't have to have a Multi-Million dollar contract to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
It's okay to correspond with your readers, and viewers, when you're in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
It's okay to be one of the MSM's little people to be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
Even when your show is ranked higher than many so-called "big time" look-at-me-I'm-so-serious shows, not that you care about that shit anyway because it's all bullshit, and you're not competitive in that way, except for just a little bit, you can be in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
It's okay to smile once in a while when you're in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You can actually read and comment on blogs when you are in Head Up Yer Ass Media. In fact it is required as part of your rehabilitation.
You don't have to be great.
You don't have to be more popular.
You don't have to be more interesting.
You don't have to be funnier.
You don't have to be better than any other member of the Mainstream Media out there.
In fact there's only one prerequisite for being in Head Up Yer Ass Media.
You have to THINK you're better than the New Media now competing in the Marketplace of Ideas.
And, if you do that, you're membership is almost assurred.
All thanks for the inspiration goes, to fellow Bear Flag League member Annika, from a post on Annika's Journal. ;-D
Go fer it Dude.
Posted by: BJM | 07/20/2006 at 12:55 PM
wa ha ha!
Posted by: annika | 07/27/2006 at 05:44 AM